Arzoo’s anecdote:
About me comments – February
Wow, Jimmy I loved the way you described your personality in such a descriptive way. How you presented yourself to be bold and audacious but still humble and respectful was pretty cool and interesting. Progressive boredom is an interesting title even though I do not completely understand the meaning of it, I do love that you care for adventure and stepping outside of your boundaries because it makes life more worthwhile. Something you should work on is making your paragraphs shorter because reading all those sentences clumped together makes one lose interest and also you should make your sentences include less commas. Other than that it was very interesting to read your ‘about me’ you and I look forward to reading more of your work because it was unique, the way you wrote, and also because I didn’t think that you were a writer but its nice to see that you are.
Wow Dikshita, I loved your poem. I loved how you wrote about yourself and elaborated using your ‘reflection’ . In the poem you seemed to be talking to yourself which I think was very creative and it felt very personal and made one feel nostalgic. Something that you can fix is substituting you vocabulary with more suitable words. Other than that I really liked reading your poem and I look forward to reading more of your work!
Dear Savannah,
I loved reading you ‘about me’. The way you wrote perfectly described your personality and allowed the readers insight into your mind. Your words were so intricately placed together to form the perfect sentences, “A heart with delicate moon fairy perched on its twisted vines reaching for the moon, fueled by its silver liquid dripping down like a leaky facet of life.”, this was one of my favorite quotes from your about me!
I could not find any mistake in your work except for some typos, other than that I loved reading your work and I can’t wait to read more.
Dear Claire,
I loved reading your ‘about me’ and really like the aesthetic of your blog! Your blog title, “claire is in space.” and your quote “but her feet are chained to the ground.” go together and I think this is very creative and I am glad you came up with this. I loved the way you wrote your ‘about me’ in third person, this was also very creative.
I personally could not find any mistakes in your work but something you could have improved is talking more about yourself rather than just your interests, like Swapanthi said.
Other than that I loved reading your about me and I look forward to reading more of your work!
sincerely,
Ayesha
Anecdote comments – march
Pierce’s anecdote: