Do you wonder of me?

Let me help you understand;

Imagine yourself a girl, you stand proud yet still afraid of what they whisper behind your back.

They speak of hate and treacherous things and you feel a hatred grow inside you, a darkness and it ignites and it grows and it burns away at the innocence of your sweet, soft beating heart.

But you tell yourself that you don’t care for what they have to say and so you pretend until it becomes real and you start to care less.

You grow strong, brave and happier.

Time is running out they say, you have to make something of yourself they say, NOW they say, but you find yourself lost and anxious because you don’t know who you are, not yet, and every time they speak you find yourself even more lost in the maze they call life.

But life is not all bad you know, sometimes its beautiful you wonder as you stare up at the jet black night sky covered in glowing stars and they twinkle and it makes you feel, and its been so long since you’ve felt.

Because life’s been hard on you and it made you feel small and you had started to believe this was all that you were and so you grew bitter but change starts to remind you that you could never be just this, you are an entire universe and you were created for magnificent things, so what made you feel so small?

And when sadness starts to abandon you, you find yourself bored and you start to realize that to be sad is a useless thing and why be sad when you could literately do whatever it is you wanted,  you could be whoever you wanted.

And everyday you become more yourself because everyday carves away at your facade.

yet you still wonder who you are and the uncertainty is painful but the curiosity agonizing.

But worry not because one day you may know yourself and

one day you will understand and one day happiness will enshroud you and you may never be afraid again.

So now you know because now you’ve felt how I’ve felt and I bet you know these feelings could’ve been your own and it shows you that we’re all just human.

Related image

Image references:                                                                                                          https://weheartit.com/vinezzapearl/collections/122872849-neon-lights  https://weheartit.com/01bby/collections/104409050-tumblr-outlines-pop-art

8 thoughts on “About Me

  1. Dear Ayesha,

    Wow, I really loved the nostalgic feel to this poem. The question at the beginning was an interesting way to grab at your reader, and the way you transported them into your mind to experience your thoughts and feelings was unreal. The final sentence,” So now you know because now you’ve felt how I’ve felt and I bet you know these feelings could’ve been your own and it shows you that we’re all just human.” was a great way to end. As for improvements, you had a lot of run on sentences which sort of interrupted the flow. I also noticed that your use of the word “and” tended to be redundant, almost losing its meaning. Besides that, I loved reading about you.

    Sincerely, Savannah

    1. Dear Savanah,
      Thank you so much for reading my ‘about me’. Thank you for your kind words and I am happy that you enjoyed my poem. I understand I should use less run on sentences and I will work on fixing this problem in the future.

  2. Wow, reading this was like looking back on life from a philosophical angle, and was very well written. I loved how you can tell how much emotion you put into this, as each sentence is filled with descriptive words, delving more into depth to allow the reader more understanding. However, what really makes this so amazing is how you were able to connect everything from beginning to end. It was smooth, kinda like if you were to ride a bike on a freshly paved road, and then you managed to tie it all back at the end, wonderful.

    I could only find two problems with this. While reading all the words you packed into your sentences to build imagery, it occurred to me that the sentences were rather long. Try to work on not making run on sentences, and splitting it up. The other problem might not even be unintentional, and that’s the spacing you had at the end. If it was intentional I’m not sure why, as it kinda made the end feel chopped up and messy.

    Other than that it was a great post, and I can’t wait to see what else you post. It might be nice to see more of these posts, that feel thoughtfull and deep, and make you contemplate life.

    -Jimmy

    1. Dear Jimmy,
      Thank you for reading my poem. I appreciate that you noticed that my poem had a smooth flow and my sentences are rather long, in the future I will work on making them shorter. Thank you for your kind words and I am glad you thought my poem was thoughtful and deep.

  3. Dear Ayesha,
    I am amazed by your work, this piece is beautiful. I can always come back to this read it again, because I relate to this a lot personally. I felt like each sentence had its own emotion, you portrayed them very fluently.
    I am honestly very excited to read your future posts.
    Sincerely,
    Dikshitha

    1. Dear Dikshita,
      Thank you for reading my poem. I am glad that you can relate to this, I feel most teenagers can relate to this post as these feelings are felt by most people in their adolescent years. Thank you again for your kind words.

  4. Dear Ayesha,

    Wow I am loving the style and theme of your blog and your About Me overall! The aesthetic is so pleasing and it fits with the mood of what your going after. The amount of description and detail put into your piece really shows the true colors of yourself and the images you have fitted into this as well.

    I would say that your sentences are a bit too long and maybe shortening them would be better. I hope I can see more of your beautiful pieces because they are amazing.

    – Zainab.K

    1. Dear Zainab,
      Thank you for reading my ‘about me’. I am glad you noticed the aesthetic of my blog, it is something that just came to be as I was working on creating my blog. I understand the run on sentences are something I should fix and I will do so in the future. Thank you again for your kind words and I am glad you enjoyed reading my poem.

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